Hunters and Gatherers

I was amused to read that "man flu" might have some basis in fact. Presumably a load of blokes were asked how they felt when they had a cold and the median value was "really shite". For women the mid-point was "shite" so - QED - men suffer from a different "intensity" of flu-like symptoms.

I am always intrigued by studies like this. They all have a unique way of stating the totally bloody obvious. Men and women are different. When it comes to behaviour, most of it - I feel - can be traced back to our hunter-gatherer roots. Men hunt, women gather. Boys play with guns, girls play with dolls. Not always, not exclusively; obviously. But on average, true. Nearly every difference in behaviour that I have ever discerned between men and women can, I think, be traced back to one of us being a hunter and the other being a gatherer. It explains virtually all of our physical differences and - I think - our sociological differences too.

So the next time some ethno-socio-bio-psycho-anthropologist comes out with some utterly banal bilge that yet again proves that women have bumpy jumpers and men don't like asking for directions just remember: Hunters and Gatherers.

Spring

I like Spring. I like the name. I like the idea. I like that Robert Hooke has a Law about it. I like the fact that supposedly unthinking organisms have a pretty good idea of when it starts (viz. snowdrops) and ends (viz. tulips). I love the fact that on the Equinox the Sun is directly over the Equator. I know this happens in late September too, but the Sun is heading south then and it merely signals the coming of Winter. That said, I like Autumn too. I'm always a bit surprised that we have only four seasons. I believe the late-mediaeval Dutch used to have six. They were probably smoking something.

Run that by me again...

Let's see if I've got this straight.
We (taxpayers) own nearly all of the Royal Bank of Scotland.

They made £4000000000 loss last year.
They are paying out over £1000000000 in bonuses.
These bonuses are to retain their "talented staff" who would otherwise leave.
Am I missing something here. Let's do that again.

They made £4000000000 loss last year.
They are paying out over £1000000000 in bonuses.
These bonuses are to retain their "talented staff" who would otherwise leave.
Nope. Still not got it.
Run that by me again...

A Chorus for Corus

"Ring of Iron"

I know of no other songs about Middlesbrough and its surrounding steelworks

Chorus:
It's all around the town, all around the town
It's all around the town, this hard ring of iron.

There's smoke up in the sky; Smoke up in the sky
There's smoke that's black and chimney stacks; As far as the eye can see

There's shipyards to the north; Chemicals to the south
Factories, stills and rolling mills; Right down to the river's mouth.

So it's out of town I'm bound; Out of town I'm bound
It's out of town I'm bound; And I'll break this ring of iron.

Join the BNP!

Great news; anyone can join the BNP. So let's do it. Every fair-minded black and asian citizen in the UK should now be filling in their application forms. The BNP is no size. Decent non-racists could completely flood it very easily. Then change it. Change it for good.
Then disband it.

Happy New Year/Lent/Easter and Two Birthdays

Goodness. February. Late February.
Where did December go? And January?
I blinked and missed wishing you all (assuming that it isn't JUST me who reads this) a merry Christmas, Happy New Year, [insert jovial adjective] Hanukah, Happy Birthday to two, Pig out Pancake Tuesday, Don't Eat Meat Ash Wednesday and probably quite a few more.
Anyway.
I'm back.

Animal Farm

At the end of Animal Farm the animals are fearfully looking through the window unable to distinguish between the pigs and the men. The people of Redcar and the workers at Corus must be thinking the same. As Brown, Darling and Mandelson sit idly by a 170-year tradition of steelmaking on Teesside is about to die. In 1980, Thatcher and her minions did exactly the same as the Consett steelworks were obliterated by a harsh world economy. A price worth paying? Just rip the heart out of a northern town. Thatcher or Brown? You couldn't get a fag paper between them. But there is a difference. Thatcher was a hard-line marketeer. She couldn't give a toss about the North, making steel, people, traditions or history. And now it turns out that our beloved PM, the conviction politician, is no better.
We might have known.
Orwell; genius.